Tell us an original joke.
I do not have any original jokes but this is one of my favorites since I am a bartender: Ever since I was a child, I've always had a fear of someone under my bed at night so I went to a shrink and told him... "I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there is somebody under it. I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy." "Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. "Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears." "How much do you charge?" "Eighty dollars per visit," replied the doctor. "I'll sleep on it," I said. Six months later the doctor met me on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me about those fears you were having?" he asked. "Well, eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money! A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new pickup!" "Is that so?" with an attitude he asked, "and how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you? "He told me to cut the legs off the bed. - Ain't nobody under there now!"
What's the most embarrassing song you know all the words to?
Wannabe - by The Spice Girls
How many chicken nuggets could you eat in one sitting?
I'm thinking 40 as long as Honey Mustard is involved.
What is the closest you've ever been to Canada?
I was actually born in Ogdensburg, NY which is right across the St. Lawrence River from Canada. I have been there several times when I was a kid. I love Niagra Falls.
Define all the bases.
1st base- French Kissing 2nd Base- Fondling or groping 3rd Base- playing with the Twat-Waffle or the Junket Pumper Home run- the girl is now a d*ck-pillow for the guy or aka: banging
Most masculine attribute:
On me? I would have to say my feet.
Ideal drunk food:
Pancakes and pot roast from IHOP
Top 5 websites:
1. Collegehumor.com--- duh! 2. youtube.com 3. victoriassecret.com 4. Facebook.com- gotta keep up with my peeps 5. target.com
Can you unwrap a Starburst with your tongue?
I don't think I have ever tried but I do have a long tongue like Gene Simmons... Ya know how they say it's physically impossible to lick your own elbow?- Well I can do that.
When a guy cries do you think he's weak?
No, I think it shows character and sensitivity.
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