Cute College Girls

Get to know Keely

What is your favorite online video?

From Funnyordie - Good Cop, Baby Cop & The Landlord. (The Funnyordie classics!) From CollegeHumor - POV: Guy Stuck in Class (the best of the POV series)

Breast implants, for or against?

Personally, I am against breast implants. Nature doesn't usually make 100-pound women with gargantuan DD boobs. Two words: Back. Problems.

What is the closest you've ever been to Canada?

I haven't just been close to Canada -- I've been there several times (I was born and raised in northern Minnesota). Once, when I was little, I went to a family friend's cabin in Canada and yanked the tail off of one of the wolf pelts hanging on the wall. This is my most vivid Canadian memory.

What is your favorite jerky and why?

Teriyaki, I suppose. I don't put much stock into jerky choices. It's just not really a big issue with me.

What is your dumper/dumpee ratio?

Based on serious relationships (of which I have had one, besides the one I am currently in), I have been the dumper. Based on my earlier exploits into the world of romance and heartbreak (middle school), I was definitely the dumpee! I once got broken up with in eighth grade in the lunchroom. This memory is seriously seared into my brain for all time. My little boyfriend at the time was sitting across the lunchroom with his friends and whispering and giggling while I was in line to buy some curly fries. Suddenly one of his friends came bouncing over to me, all self-important as the whole lunch room watched his approach with bated breath. I had one of those "OH SHIT" moments as I saw him coming and in a flash of clarity, I knew what was coming. He smirked when he reached me and held out a crumpled-up bit of brown paper. I tried to ignore him, but I was only prolonging the inevitable. Finally, I took the paper. It was a little scrap torn off of a brown paper lunch bag with only four words written on it: "Just friends. Love, Mike." Middle school was so vicious.

Shower or bath?

Shower. I'm a busy girl, and just don't have the leisure time necessary to sit in a bath for hours. Plus, the idea of a bath is pretty gross when you think about it. The longer you sit in the water, the more you're actually soaking in your own filth that you've sloughed off.

Worst job you've ever had:

My job experience is limited... I've worked as a waitress in my step-dad's bar for two-plus years, at Target for eight months, and at Abercrombie for ten months. Of the three, Target was the worst. It was just really monotonous and I was constantly getting yelled at for talking when I was supposed to be working. I can't help it; I'm a loquacious person by nature.

If you had to choose your last words right now:

This is really the money question! Now, I would want the last words that I utter on this earth to be epic, powerful, incisive, and totally badass. Something along the lines of, "You thought you won, didn't you, you filthy ****ing Martians? But this bomb will take you down with me and the human race will be safe from you forever." And then go out in a blast of glory.

Pet peeve:

My pet peeve? Well, now, let's see. I guess it would have to be, when someone is trying to get to know you as a person, when they ask you the starter question: "So what are your pet peeves?" It's like, really? This is how you are going to gauge my personality? My pet peeves? I mean there are so many better questions out there, for example: Who is your favorite literary hero and why? Would you rather be Batman, Superman, or Ironman? If you could go back to any period in history and meet any one historical figure of that time period, when and whom? What is the one day of your life you will never forget? Which person whom you have never met has made the biggest influence on your life? Would you rather be the best looking, the most intelligent, or the richest person on the planet? AND MORE. (Sorry to be snarky.)

When are you going to tell your parents you're on birth control? They have a right to know, they raised you for God's sake!

Hmm. This question is actually not applicable as I am not on birth control. And I actually do tell my parents everything. In my family, not sharing is NOT the issue: over sharing is!