Why He's There: Because there's nowhere else to go. All his old college buds are married with kids, and this is the one time during the year he can recreate his glory days, which weren't even that glorious to begin with.
Catchphrase: "BACK IN MY DAY WE (muffled, presumably racist comment)"
Cheer: "WOOOO AHHHH YEAAAA I LOOOOVE Y'ALLLL"
Body Paint Pat
Why He's There: To show off his sculpted back and not-so-impressive pectorals.
Catchphrase: "Can someone feed this hotdog to me? My hands are covered in a highly toxic blue paint."
Celebratory Cheer: "THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' 'BOUT! SOMEONE GIVE ME MY DULY DESERVED DAPS"