Now, I know it's hard to choose a favorite leaping giant. There are just so many — all of them great. And I know what you're thinking: Gheorghe Mureșan is certainly everyone's favorite. The man is a treasure on the court AND on the silver screen. How could anyone be better than the titular star of My Giant? By being Jeff Withey, that's how. Sorry Gheorghe!

Move over, Honey Possums, there's a new mammal in town! I know you were excited — out of the over 5,000 different species of mammal (including humans), I had selected you as my favorite, but it turns out you're not as cool as beluga whales, who are apparently the corgis of the ocean. I think this is because they live in the ocean, and people on the Internet will fake enthusiasm for them in order to seem cute or funny or something. But don't worry, Honey Possums, you can still be my favorite marsupial.

Weirdo Gorge Catanda sure likes messing with Seinfeld. Why? Who knows. But this anonymous absurdist auteur has managed to craft his very own "YouTube channel about nothing." A weird, glorious nothing. Just last week, he slowed the show's theme song down by 1,200 percent to absolutely terrifying effect:

Dunkin Donuts recently released a new breakfast sandwich that uses a a glazed donut as bread. A bunch of people are up in arms about this because it's "unhealthy" and a "perfect illustration of the kind of institutionalized decadence that has led to our nation's obesity problem," but that's not why I'm upset about it. I'm upset because most Dunkin Donuts stores are joint Dunkin Donuts/Baskin Robbins, and they STILL haven't combined the donuts and the ice cream. How is that possible? Don't they realize the opportunities they're missing?

They could be making stuff like this:

A lioness with a taste for toddler.

Ken M is an internet commenter who brings a uniquely moronic perspective to the issues of the day. Fueled by a winning combination of ignorance and confidence, Ken's insights range from the painfully dumb to the soul-crushingly stupid.