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Guy: "OOOOHHHHHH GURRRRLLL welcome to the DMV, my name is Shaniqua HAAAAYYYYY how can I help you?"
You: "Uh, hello... Shaniqua. Since you're my cousin, I was wondering if you could hook me up with a job here?"
Guy: "Say WHAAAATTT??? DAYUMMNNN you ain't my cousin" [snaps a bunch of times while moving head back and forth]
You: "I'm NOT coming to your stupid concert, Dad, and that's final!"
Guy: "Dad? That's a funny thing to call your Priest. Anyway, come into my van, little child, I have a special surprise for you..."
You: [Trying not to groan] "Yes...but we've been over this, I'm not coming to your...priest van, or whatever."
Guy: "Well then at least come with me on my secret one-on-one Boy Scouts retreat where we go off into the woods together, WINKKKKK. That's right, I am also a Boy Scout counselor."
You: [Trying really really hard not to groan] "As I told you, I'm not going on your one-on-one Boy Scouts retreat. I'm out of here." [Mimes grabbing door]
Guy: "Then why are you grabbing my PENIS? That's right, that's my penis - it wraps around all the way to there, where your hand is, and that is what you're grabbing. We're having sex now."
You: [9 hour groan]
It's even better from a real tap. Watch Video ▶
Starring in a reboot of the old classic, "Some Like it Frumpy." View Picture ▶
Look the part, book the part. Watch Video ▶