If it isn't on the Internet, the government can't find it.Watch Video ▶
Ken M is an internet commenter who brings a uniquely moronic perspective to the issues of the day. Fueled by a winning combination of ignorance and confidence, Ken's insights range from the painfully dumb to the soul-crushingly stupid.
Nothing screams bachelor more than places where you can sit and also sleep, but are uncomfortable to do either.
Ah yes, the inevitable futon. It's has been a mainstay in bachelor pads for years. It dates back to the cavemen who also had horrible taste in furniture and an $87 furniture budget (or four shiny rocks and three roundy rocks, in 40,000 BC rates). So there's no question as to why bachelors feel this urge to purchase used futons from Craigslist it's a primal urge, daggone-it! Here's the problem: No one actually likes these things. No one. Not the owner. Not the visitor. Not the company that made it. Not the trucker who delivered it. Not the spiders that live in it.
What's worse is that futons always break. Always. They always do. As a matter of fact, and this isn't even a joke, I broke the futon in my girlfriend's brother's room just a few days back. Seriously. Its like these things have expiration dates. And what's worse, do you know that the owner will NEVER throw the futon away? No matter how many razor sharp, flesh mutilating pieces the futons breaks into, the futon will retain it's place in the living room or bedroom of a bachelor like some sort of medieval torture device. There are only two ways to get rid of a bachelor's futon:
In "Twidiots", we collect the choicest thoughts on a particular topic from Twitter's millions of users.
In the wake of the revelation that the NSA has been indiscriminately seizing phone records (and quite possibly much more), many Americans are furious. As they should be just at the NSA. Not at NASA. Because they are entirely different governmental organizations. Take note, Tweeps.
Honestly, I don't care if NASA and the FBI have my phone records. like seriously, keep them. I sure don't want them. Candy Hearts (@CandyHeartsBand) June 7, 2013