"The worst comment you can get about your brand new, full chest, tattoo."

Once she reaches the top she has to defeat Miley Cyrus in a fist fight.

At least his textbook won't suffer water damage. It's still in the plastic wrap.

They're the two most popular girls in school.

It makes a great back scratcher though.

Dad used to be so fun. Apparently Mom still thinks he is.

"Next time don't interrupt my nap, Mom."