Woah woah woah, hold on there. Why are you still wearing shirts?

You can keep the 30 cents.

From otiose321

It is, however, a great way to remove yourself as someone's friend.

If art degree remains valuable for more than four hours, call a doctor immediately.

From caedis

Even if you could, you'd just get hair on your palms.

From goodatinternet

But what if the desk was actually mahogany?

From alwaystheherooftimerealornotreal

When you said you could make your foot touch your head I thought you meant something else.

From ExtraDip