A couple of months ago my boyfriend wanted to have sex but I was tired, so I closed my legs and said, "You shall not pass." Last night at dinner my hand was moving over his leg and moved to his crotch. He grabbed my wrist and said, "One does not simply walk into Mordor." Touche, David, touche.
"Hello? Hi, I need a tow truck and a can of upholstery cleaner please."
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Girls Making Out
It's a Christmas miracle!
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Unfortunately he's also color blind, so the joke's on him.
Cute Girl With Armpit Shark Tattoo
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These guys are getting called out by the reeferee.
