Slip 'n' Slide

When you said you could make your foot touch your head I thought you meant something else.

From ExtraDip

He had to change his Twitter handle to @reputationdestr0yed.

From King of Pith

But what if the desk was actually mahogany?

From alwaystheherooftimerealornotreal

I'd be a lot less offended if it were listed as "hard." I can never remember which way the pointy things go.

From David Young

She gets her pants from the same place as The Incredible Hulk. Nothing can burst through these things.

From bowhunter6274

He has her tweeting out of the palm of his hand.

From Food Network Humor