I used to work for a chinese computer company that no longer exists; one Christmas Eve a man comes into the store right as we are closing and counting money and insists that we start up the Point of Sale system again and sell him the video card he reserved online. We tell him that the computers have been shut down and all the transactions of the day batched and sent to the... Read More »
I'm sorry officer... I didn't know I couldn't do that
Got a little tipsy and decided to stick it to the man by peeing on a squad car parked in an alley outside my apartment. I probably should have noticed that the officers were right in the car. They let me finish going though before putting the cuffs on.
Nipple Wizard
"You're a wizard, hairy."
Bikini Girl Rock Climbing
Once she reaches the top she has to defeat Miley Cyrus in a fist fight.
Cute Girl Internet Browsers
"Browser? I hardly even know her--and even if I did, who would be interested in a person who made that joke?"
Goth Kids With Santa
They're slowly killing him by sucking all the joy away.
Epic Nerd Photobombs Hot Girl
She hasn't been seen since.
Nudity Is Required In All Pools
This family trip is about to get awkward.




Fixed it!
The kind of sports you can expect to see on ESPN17
Oh good, my package came. I've got a big night ahead of me.
And that's why you always leave a note
Siri, what is the temperature... because I just got burned!
Pfft I listened to polka covers of arena rock before it was cool
Forever a zone
The other side of Adele's story
Spending your Valentine's Day on the internet? This will make everything better.
Thoughts on Valentine's Day from people who are paid to be cynical bastards.