I was having sex with my girlfriend with the movie gladiator playing quietly in the background. She finished right before the epic scene which prompted me to raise my arms and yell "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED!?"
"He walked up to the photographer with a cello, a bag of pillows and blankets and immediately asked if he could take his shirt off. When she told him no he replied, 'Alright, the transformers shirt will do."
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Little Girl Smash
"Next time don't interrupt my nap, Mom."
What She's Really Dreaming About
Her professor did that to teach her a lesson.
Hooters Girls Don't "Do" Evil
Except for that guy Rick they all dated, he was the worst.
Nipple Wizard
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Dad used to be so fun. Apparently Mom still thinks he is.
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Yoga pants so tight, they've become a part of her.
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Journalists finally revealing some hard-to-face truths
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Roommate Contract: (1) I will make your life a living hell.
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Fixed it!
The kind of sports you can expect to see on ESPN17
Oh good, my package came. I've got a big night ahead of me.
