i always found her tities a bit sour for my liking

When you said you could make your foot touch your head I thought you meant something else.

From ExtraDip

It is, however, a great way to remove yourself as someone's friend.

The nature walk from Hell.

From whatsthedillpickle

Her net is just nerdy guys who have accepted the fact that being fallen on is the only way they'll ever make contact.

From fotodahora

Sings about "Someone Like You," won't say who "You" is.

From therealscumbagsteve

Even if you could, you'd just get hair on your palms.

From goodatinternet