A couple of months ago my boyfriend wanted to have sex but I was tired, so I closed my legs and said, "You shall not pass." Last night at dinner my hand was moving over his leg and moved to his crotch. He grabbed my wrist and said, "One does not simply walk into Mordor." Touche, David, touche.
Those sexy accordeonistes aren't after his car. Let's just say he's packing something more than just the accordion.
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Little Girl Smash
"Next time don't interrupt my nap, Mom."
Math Machine Doodle
How do you show your work?
Girl is Super Excited About Her Headphones
Who knew "Sounds of the Rainforest" could bring so much joy.
Girls Dress In All The Underwear
Their third roommate is somehow wearing all the high heels.
Hooters Girls Don't "Do" Evil
Except for that guy Rick they all dated, he was the worst.
Woman Uses Butt to Grip Subway Pole
You should see how she hails a cab.
Spending your Valentine's Day on the internet? This will make everything better.
Thoughts on Valentine's Day from people who are paid to be cynical bastards.
The 3D makes this movie look real...ly sucky
Your pet says a lot about you. But then, you have a gossipy parrot.
Guys try to surf without water, and somehow succeed.
Ice T is good, but this time of year it's all about CoCo
Yeah! And why did Microsoft make Bing when they can just use Google?
Valentine's Day was simpler back then. And creepier.
Hey! Get your real world out of my internet!
These guys are getting called out by the reeferee.
