"I invented the piano key neck tie! I invented it!"
With all the oil on the Gulf Coast no wonder she switched to BYOP (Bring Your Own Pool).
He should invent a key that honks loudly at all times. That way, you never lose it.
"I wonder if she got it all."
Now all she has to do is find Legolas. Then have him accept her for the freak she is.
This dude has pictures of Curly from the Three Stooges tattooed all over him. No joke.