Picture "Three Coats of Paint, nine Coats of Polyurethane, and an innovative gutter system to collect spilled beer!" You guys aren't collecting the spilled beer for drinking, right?
Picture Everyone loves a one night stand on Halloween. On the back it asks, Can you turn me on?" My lampshade actually lit up!
Picture "This one has a secret compartment in the back. You cant see in it from this angle, but its big enough for three 1.75s of Heaven Hill Vodka." As if your cardboard bar is going to fool anyone into thinking you don't have alcohol.