Someone has to stop him, he is becoming a being of pure energy!
Someone always has to wear the wacky toga.
The band was going to sacrifice him as part of the show, but he was the only one that bought merch. Even if it was just to eat.
Someone needs to break the news to the little one that MJ has passed. Not it.
Like that's going to stop someone.
Someone has to feed all those people working on the Death Star!