"Every year during homecoming the 'war on sobriety' gets tanked for the full week of homecoming."
"Colbert was the grand marshal of Northwestern's homecoming parade."
The virgin is mobile. I repeat. The virgin is mobile.
"The vehicle that carried my ass around in Iraq."
Dress for the job you want, not the job that is real.
The real goal here is to win best Father of the Year. And hopefully the kid has fun too.