"The Operator - melts your face, not your lungs"
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Little Girl Smash
"Next time don't interrupt my nap, Mom."
I Heart The Color Blind
Unfortunately he's also color blind, so the joke's on him.
Hooters Girls Don't "Do" Evil
Except for that guy Rick they all dated, he was the worst.
Girls Dress In All The Underwear
Their third roommate is somehow wearing all the high heels.
You're Using The Toilet Brush Wrong
It makes a great back scratcher though.
Little Girl Worried About Mommy
Dad used to be so fun. Apparently Mom still thinks he is.




+
Fixed it!
The kind of sports you can expect to see on ESPN17
Oh good, my package came. I've got a big night ahead of me.
And that's why you always leave a note
Siri, what is the temperature... because I just got burned!
Pfft I listened to polka covers of arena rock before it was cool
Forever a zone
The other side of Adele's story
Spending your Valentine's Day on the internet? This will make everything better.
Thoughts on Valentine's Day from people who are paid to be cynical bastards.