The cat hiding from me because I was too drunk.

Yo dawg, I heard you like talking about me.

From absolutelymadness

If art degree remains valuable for more than four hours, call a doctor immediately.

From caedis

Even if you could, you'd just get hair on your palms.

From goodatinternet

The score about boobs and looking at them.

From thesleeplesssleeps

Sings about "Someone Like You," won't say who "You" is.

From therealscumbagsteve

There's no dog in this one--they cut all of Billy Bob Thornton's scenes.

From xxlittlethoughts