Shortly after, Kanye West was shot 9 times and teabagged,

At least his textbook won't suffer water damage. It's still in the plastic wrap.

Unfortunately he's also color blind, so the joke's on him.

She hasn't been seen since.

"Gretchen, NO!"

"Browser? I hardly even know her--and even if I did, who would be interested in a person who made that joke?"

Who knew "Sounds of the Rainforest" could bring so much joy.