"I was cutting wood with table saw and my thumb became the wood." WARNING: GROSSEST THING EVER.

I like to imagine he's singing.

From bassman109

The nature walk from Hell.

From whatsthedillpickle

I'd be a lot less offended if it were listed as "hard." I can never remember which way the pointy things go.

From David Young

But what if the desk was actually mahogany?

From alwaystheherooftimerealornotreal

He had to change his Twitter handle to @reputationdestr0yed.

From King of Pith

She gets her pants from the same place as The Incredible Hulk. Nothing can burst through these things.

From bowhunter6274