I got a tattoo of my evil twin.
"Yeah, I broke up with Olivia and now I'm dating this girl named 'Shit Happens'"
Sure it's a cheesy joke. But it's the good kind of cheesy.
There's no such thing as a good butt tattoo.
"Actually, on second thought, can you just tattoo regret on my back. I don't mean the word 'regret' I mean the idea of regret in tattoo form. Thanks!"
Hey Machete, you know what I just noticed? Isn't that supposed to end in an M?