Note to self: Hide your masturbation material when trying to rent your apartment.

"You're a wizard, hairy."

Using the bridge just seemed too easy.

It makes a great back scratcher though.

"Browser? I hardly even know her--and even if I did, who would be interested in a person who made that joke?"

Dad used to be so fun. Apparently Mom still thinks he is.

This family trip is about to get awkward.