Slow? Looks like a brisk little chap right there.

Sings about "Someone Like You," won't say who "You" is.

From therealscumbagsteve

If art degree remains valuable for more than four hours, call a doctor immediately.

From caedis

Have you ever been hypnotized?

From Hotwir3

You know, in the time it took you to draw this, you could have taken out the trash.

From Percipere

You can keep the 30 cents.

From otiose321

He has her tweeting out of the palm of his hand.

From Food Network Humor