You don't say...

I'd be a lot less offended if it were listed as "hard." I can never remember which way the pointy things go.

From David Young

Yo dawg, I heard you like talking about me.

From absolutelymadness

The nature walk from Hell.

From whatsthedillpickle

When you said you could make your foot touch your head I thought you meant something else.

From ExtraDip

Sings about "Someone Like You," won't say who "You" is.

From therealscumbagsteve

But what if the desk was actually mahogany?

From alwaystheherooftimerealornotreal