A 9 year old would know this doesn't even make sense.
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This is the front page of the local newspapers "extra" sports section.
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cliznif
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One of the misdemeanors was not wearing any pants.

Clippy the Paperclip is Still Here to Help
NOO MINNIE MOUSE NOO!
Tim Duncan is Getting Warm and Cozy With a Fan [Best Photobomb]
Candidate For Worst Driver in the World