Picture "My friends and I were in a local porn shop killing time and saw this guy. Pic was taken with my phone, but a look at the titles across the bottom will confirm it's a porn shop, and this guy has his baby there." Yeah right, killing time.
Picture Toddlers are easy to control, just tell them there's a dinosaur under their bed. If they stop taking you seriously, put a dinosaur under their bed.
Picture Hiding a Penthouse in a Sports Illustrated is only slightly more deceptive than putting a forty in a brown paper bag.