"He just found out it's permanent marker."
Not so powerful anymore, Google.
After sex most men have to roll over, grab a marker and some oak tag, and piss off a preacher.
"Completely fried his laptop, and it smelled awful all night."
No, this is the color of big potatoes. Can't you do anything right?
"We spilled coke on our friend's laptop so we got him a new one."