Not all our costumes are sexy. Unsexy mustard!

Puttin' on the Ritz.

I'd like to supersize that bag of oats.

"My buddy Charlie decided to invite some fat girls back to our hotel room. As soon as they showed up one passed out on the floor between the wall and the bed and the other on the bed face down, ass in the air. They wouldn't wake up so we took one's dignity by using her ass as a fast food table. Then we woke them up and kicked them out."

Would you like loneliness with that?

Don't worry, they were free range dogs.

Because you asked for it, Samuel L. Jackson in a hamburger bra.

This will be the first and last time you ever hear someone call Taco Bell high quality tacos - "We saw your picture of six guys doing 100 tacos from taco bell. They had it easy with such high quality tacos. We here at UCD go with the cheaper, greasier, more nauseating brand (Jack in the Box) and we do it with half the people."

You can have this bagel bite when you pry it from my cold dead hands.

"100 tacos, 6 people - it was a valiant effort, but in the end the tacos won." Are those three on the Blue Barracudas or something?

Shanghai Fried Chicken.

You guys still mistreat animals, right?

I hope a stripper jumps out of that thing.

"I decided that one quad stacker from BK wasn't enough. So, I made The Ocho."

This one's for America guys.

Eat at Gateway, where the founders have used their immortality to study and perfect the hamburger.

"I was in Acapulco and I I couldn't figure out why I felt so sick. Then I looked in my camera and remembered what the hamburger I got from a street vendor the previous night at 3 AM looked like."

His legacy lives on in a chain of disgusting fast food restaurants known to abuse chickens.

Violent food always sells well.

"Wieners are ready, who's hungry?"

Don't worry, there's barely any chicken in KFC!

Taco Bell is a unique restaurant in that they hire their ingredients.

What's an even better opportunity than than seeing a beautiful woman broken down on the side of the road?

Go to the library if you wanna do that stuff.

A burger so good you'll enjoy it twice!

It's a dog-eat-cat world out there.

Hot girls, hot dogs.

Ronald got special sauce all over Wendy.

They make pumpkin beer, so why not?

That's nothing. I once ate a burger so big I had to cut it in half with a machine gun.

"Two Krispy Kreme donuts as buns on the fantastic Baconator - the breakfast of champions."

Even Wendys employees are Lovin' It.

"First we take two three quarter pound burgers mixed with four slices of bacon and injected with cheddar cheese. Then top with three slices of bacon and three slices of cheddar each. Sandwich it all between two Krispy Kreme glazed doughnuts and slathered in Fat Fred BBQ sauce. We call it... the Luther."

If you think Colonel Sanders is a friendly old man, you should meet the guy who runs Pure Pleasure.

If it rained hot dogs and mustard, this would truly be a better world.

If you go to In-N-Out Burger and demand anything up to a 250x250, they are legally required to give it to you.

"Denny's Beer Barrel Pub in Clearfield, PA have done it again, they attempt to break the record for the largest commercially available hamburger, their new burger weighs over 120 pounds." I asked for mine with no pickles.

A hamburger on a hot dog bun, however, is allowed.

Adding quotes around food would be great sign vandalism.

Excuse me, I asked for no mustard.

What's an even better opportunity than than seeing a beautiful woman broken down on the side of the road?

It's a dog-eat-cat world out there.

That's nothing. I once ate a burger so big I had to cut it in half with a machine gun.

"Two Krispy Kreme donuts as buns on the fantastic Baconator - the breakfast of champions."

"First we take two three quarter pound burgers mixed with four slices of bacon and injected with cheddar cheese. Then top with three slices of bacon and three slices of cheddar each. Sandwich it all between two Krispy Kreme glazed doughnuts and slathered in Fat Fred BBQ sauce. We call it... the Luther."

If it rained hot dogs and mustard, this would truly be a better world.

If you go to In-N-Out Burger and demand anything up to a 250x250, they are legally required to give it to you.

"Denny's Beer Barrel Pub in Clearfield, PA have done it again, they attempt to break the record for the largest commercially available hamburger, their new burger weighs over 120 pounds." I asked for mine with no pickles.

Excuse me, I asked for no mustard.

You forgot to put it all over a hot dog!

Let this be a lesson to the rest of you, put down the hot dog before they take a picture.