Baby Accident

Don't worry, he already couldn't walk.

Asparagus Cake

Type II Diabetes is a small price to pay for your pee not smelling.

Note To All Carjackers

Then it's agreed upon. We'll just steal the car.

From deagle1330

Masturbation is Forbidden Banner

"What if your penis is smaller than an elephant's? I'm asking for a friend."

Marriage Announcement Misspelling

Here's to hoping they write their own vows.

Harry Potter Verse

And Harry said unto Voldermort, "I shall strike thee darkness down with a triumphant flick of my wand." And it was so.

Lost ThunderCat

Apparently not all of the ThunderCats have returned to Cartoon Network.

Don't Like My Driving?

I'll keep my comments to myself.

From RIBS

Letter to Senior on Prom Night

Now here's a picture of a flower to deflower.

Fat Photographer

"You sure you're not hot out here?"

Suspicious People Police Blotter

Should've known it was a bunch of Canucks. Flappy-headed miscreants.

Beatles Abbey Road Background

Paul Cole later proclaimed, "I'm glad some of them are dead before me. Good riddance."

Disposable Camera in Mail

A lot of mailmen did things no mailman should do.

Spiderman in Classroom

Someone had a little too much of Mary Jane last night.

School's Starting Message to Teachers

Unless Bottle is a kid's name. Then it's discouraged.

Ministry of Magic Toilet

It's just a pipe dream.

Cat Staring Competition

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, I'll give it another go.

Gorilla Chillaxing on Staircase

He's going absolutely ape sit over here.

Dog Food Not Tested on Animals

They just dared a bunch of drunk college kids to eat some. Most are okay now.

Caution Ballroom Dancing

Just don't slip on the dip.

BadAss Tombstone

He also dug the plot for his grave before jumping in to his death.

Harry Potter Trivial Pursuit Question

Ladies can't resist the Phoenix feather core.