Oompa Loompas at the prom.

The book was better.

Apple's corporate water polo team is in fine form this season.

A child genius hatches a plan to make himself the only kid whose letter gets to Santa.

"Congratulations, Senator Baroski!"

The follow-up is an anklet tattoo that says, "No regrets."

The fine isn't for touching the wires; it's for dying like a weakling.

"Community Damage Billing!"--From the lesser known Fecalopoly.

The weird thing is that this is an 8 year-old's birthday cake.

Well, fairly gigantic.

Mario after getting the magic bottle cap power-up.

This, and midgets, is what pro wrestling is all about.

B+. I probably would give him an A- if he had written, "Or is it?" after, "The End."

From the Satanic Picture Bible.

This was the groom's cake, and by that we mean only the groom ate it.

If you kids don't quiet down back there, mom's going to turn this bus around!

Finally, my two favorite movies meet!

And yet, we still don't have a female president.

You should come, everyone gets their deacon something.

Hello, righty? Yeah, this is lefty. What, say that again? I can barely hear you. Just email me.

God bless America!

Way to mess another one up America ...

A much better movie.

"The exhaust tip is a warp whistle..."

This is great because, really, both names could mean penis.

The ultimate shaming.

"This man was in the drive-thru at a tobacco store on a riding lawn mower, towing what appeared to be his mother in a rocking chair and a night gown. It's a miracle I was able to capture this on film."

Yeah I'm on step 9 so I have to make amends with people I've wronged.

KILL CRUSH DESTROY

I didn't know dogs did anything but doggy style.

In his new movie, Van Damme plays a squirrel.

Chazz breathed a sigh of relief and was glad he used a fake name.

When you move out of college you leave some things behind.

The Air Guitars have been oppressed for far too long.

Good thing it doesn't say, "stand."

Que Cera Cera.

Turns out he's been conning 96% of the world's population for thousands of years now.

Offer only good if two or less people eat all of it.

"I have access to an x-ray machine and I get bored at work a lot."

"This man was in the drive-thru at a tobacco store on a riding lawn mower, towing what appeared to be his mother in a rocking chair and a night gown. It's a miracle I was able to capture this on film."

In his new movie, Van Damme plays a squirrel.

WARNING - ELECTRIC BOOGALOO FENCE

"Long story short, everyone now calls my friend Mike, 'Spikey Mikey."

Tropical climates are good for two things - being naked, or looking at naked people.

"I built this grill for my High School FFA Project. It took over a year to design and build."

"Hungry for souls."

USA! USA!

STOP CHECKING YOUR CELL PHONE.

Anyone but dudes.

Nice try, but my parents stopped having sex like decades ago. They don't even love each other anymore! IN YOUR FACE!

This is the North Dakota state flag.

They couldn't get Paul Giamatti back for the sequel to Sideways.

It's just a trick, there's actually a guy sticking his head through a hole in the table.

Guy in the middle - it must be depressing to know that you'll never have a better picture of yourself. Unless you befriend a sixth girl.

Every camera should come with this picture already on it.

I ran into Stanley, pretty much the happiest he's ever looked.

Putting the "fun" back in crucifixFUN!

This is what girls do when you're not around.

Just another night out binge drinking with mom...