Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
What a coincidence, I'm really into girls with terrible tattoos.
This is why god invented tables.
Men really got the long end of the stick on pajama parties.
Fate is when you install a keggerator on Wednesday, and school is cancelled on Thursday.
"Three Coats of Paint, nine Coats of Polyurethane, and an innovative gutter system to collect spilled beer!" You guys aren't collecting the spilled beer for drinking, right?
Yeah mom, nothing's new. Nah, you don't have to worry. Same old, same old over here.
You are under arrest for moving - you totally moved.
This should be on the Wii.
"Astro Turf and Spray Paint made for the Super Bowl of drinking games. It was like playing Quarters, but you only get 4 downs, each cup had a yard value depending on its level of difficulty to reach (2 ten yarders, 1 twenty yarder, and one 30 yarder). F
Nature evolved this beast to lure in, entangle, and eventually devour college students.
Ironically, he's just beginning a lifetime of regret.
"This is what happens when, after Halloween, pumpkins get smashed all over your house and someone tries to dispose of the seeds by putting them down the bathroom sink."
If it's written on an inflatable penis, it must be true.
Honey, we never go dancing at Burger King like we used to.
Thanks. I have a deadly bee allergy, yet I was unaware they are outside.
Who wears short shorts?I wear short shorts!
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