Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
"How to get a 5th into a football game."
"You know when you need to get a gift for someone who you want to break up with, but you're passive aggressive?"
It would be more fun to watch her play Wii Sports.
Has anybody seen my pink panties? Why is the dog moaning?
"Watching him puke during the opening credits, pass out for the whole thing, and wake up just enough to be oblivious was much more entertaining than the movie itself."
Someone should tell the worst Jews ever over here that there are eight nights of Hanukah.
Reverse beer bong.
Frightened R Parents
"Damnit! Who put a question mark in the Death Star?"
I've got $30 - how far do you think we can get on a little more than four gallons of gas.
It's always funny to see glamor photos like this one in a college dorm room. Nice Nickelback poster.
"Damn I drove all the way out here for nothing."
"My friend has a buddy that works in the University registrar and when he had his ID made, his friend put this name on it. He didn't notice until two weeks later. He then told the University, who gave him free text books and fired his friend."
"Meh, Van Damme can do it better," said the guy who was missing the point.
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We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.