Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
I told you we need twenty-five parking spots. If you leave us only twenty-four, we're not paying.
Oh great, I'm stuck with these guys for the next 18 years.
"Alright sir, I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the car and take a breathalyser test.""No, sir, I'm going to have to ask YOU to step out of the car."
Baby that's all we need.
I wish Britney Spears would decide if she's hot already.
"He should never have left it parked in that rough cubicle."
Hi, now can I see your license and registration? You were doing 105 in a school zone.
Finally, a Russian roulette for kids. Ever since I showed my 9-year-old the Deer Hunter he's been dying to play.
"Uh oh... better start digging."
I can't believe you hit your runner-runner flush draw. You drunk crustacean - who plays 3-9 suited ?
Is it senior picture season already?
Hi, I think I could be the new store manager.
I'm a sucker if I don't buy a deluxe filter mask!
"We accept cash, credit, and gold coins."
I know this is a bad time, but do you have the $5 you owe me?
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We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.