• The Mozart is an Overrated Prick Who Hasn't Got Nearly My Sense of Fashion,Concerto in D Minor.
  • The I'm Not Gay But I Will Marry Whoever Shall Have Me…Somebody…Anybody…For God's Sake I'm So Alone, Overture
  • The It's Surely a Good Thing Our Good Tsar Has Permanently Run Those Nasty Bolsheviks Out of the Country. They Shan't Ever Return, Ever, in C for String Orchestra.
  • The Holla at My Cholera, Piano Sonata in G Major.
  • The Fireworks, Explosions, Ballet, Victory Party with Cannonball Firing and Much Ballyhooing!!!, Fantasy Overture.

  • The How Much Wood Could a Wood Chuck Chuck If That Woodchuck Was That Pompous, Sniveling John Philip Sousa? None, That's How Much, Concerto.
  • The If I Have to Endure One More Court Magistrate Misspelling My Last Name on My Payment Vouchers I Shall Render a Ballet To Be Played At His Funeral in a Most Inappropriatly Celebratory Manner, in E Minor for cello and orchestra.