Make $1000 a day at home!!! – Shirley’s son, Michael – you met him at Ruth’s wedding – well he’s becoming a cardiologist. What have you been doing these last few days?

FrEE viAGrA!!!! – I know, I know, you don’t need it. All I’m saying is, try it. Fine, give it your brother then, what do I know? I'm just an old woman.

Be Debt Free in 1 month!! – Look at all these bills!! This is why I told you to cut out those coupons from Sunday’s paper. You wouldn’t be in this mess if you had just listened to me. You’ve made your father very disappointed.

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– Why haven’t you found yourself a nice girl yet? That Laura was really special. Yes, I know, she was interested in Maureen, but still you could have tried harder. Any girl would be lucky to have you. They always tell me how good looking you are.

Samir is a Nigerian infant. You can help feed him with just your credit card number.
– See how thin he is? All skin and bones! He just needs a little nosh. I’m sure your sister would be happy to help. She was always the kind one.