Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
105% Issue #22
June 11, 2007
Strong enough to kill a bear, but made for children.
An elephant never forgets, but that's why God invented roofies.
Every Wikipedia article should be prefaced with, "People who enjoy editing encyclopedias as a hobby pretty much agree that:"
"I really like that girl's sex."
Loser: "I'm into Nickelback."
Mega-loser: "I was into Nickelback before they were cool."
Philosophy News Promo
What is knowledge? The answer schools don't want you to know, assuming it's true that you can really know that you know, once you know. At 11, keeping in mind that time is a subjective construct.
Emergency or Troubled Marriage?
"There's too much pressure."
"I need some air!"
"Are those crabs?"
Bad times for "That's what she said"
"Jim was a good man. As we remember him today, let us close our eyes, and feel his presence within us all."
"Your son has been late to class and picking on the other children. Frankly, I want you to pull him out before something worse happens."
"Mr. Johnson, the cancer is spreading. I want you in bed every day."
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