Is it time to Switch to a Novelty T-shirt?
  • Pestered by pesky "dignity"?
  • Are you tired of having a sensible wardrobe populated with plain t-shirts and crisp, clean button-ups?
  • Do you like groan-inducing puns or jokes that garner a single laugh?
  • Remember that one thing from the 80's? Do ya? With the guy and the song? Remember?
  • Do you enjoy nostalgia that even a Bedford Avenue hipster would dismiss as "too kitschy"?
  • Do you want people to know that you are, in fact, with Stupid?
  • Is the idea of rapidly outdated pop-culture references appealing to you?

And most importantly:
  • Do you want to be the dude that no one makes eye contact with? The guy that people avoid in the hallway, for fear of having to talk to you?

If you answered 'yes' to one or more questions, it's time to talk to your doctor
about Novelty T-Shirts.

Slipped over the body through patented "sleeves" and "neckhole", it immediately relieves you of any back-cramping 'dignity' and lets people know that, no, it's not going to suck itself! Yes, you'll drink until she's cute! And yes, Bush is a Fascist dictator hellbent on brainwashing us and eating our souls!

Novelty Shirts: Because Everything's Funnier When It's Printed on Poly-Cotton Blend.