It was a long night full of Jager shots and pretending to listen to girls talk. Too bad you didn't try harder. Because now you're alone in your room with your roommate who just threw up into his own hamper and passed out under the futon. You're sober enough to know that drunkenly IMing the girl you used to hook up with is a bad idea, but still drunk enough not to care. And since I can't do anything to stop you at this point, here are, at least, a few things that you can and can't say.