Smooth Black Guy :: Creepy White Dude

is the guy "friend" to all the girls, especially hot blonde girls with huge titstries to be the guy friend to all the girls, but is taken as a creepy white guy looking to rape the hot blonde girls with huge titsfeels confident in talking to any lady, of any race and any religionfeels confident in making passes at Asian girls, who he's had a sick fetish for since Final Fantasy lives in a smokin' hot bachelor pad off-campuslives in an underground lair where he is heralded as the "rat king"" aka his R.A. single bedroom on campushas a deep, tender loving voice that commands respect and makes you ooze on the spothas a cracking, prepubescent screech that emits from his mouth in what can only be used to call small rodents to his underground lairscopes out the chicks in classy sunglasses wherever he goesscopes out the chicks using highly powerful binoculars bought on eBaymakes sweet love to the ladiesrapes his stuffed Elmohas sex for hours on end in an orgy of gorgeous women" Asian, African, and Caucasian.prematurely ejaculates into his Sesame Street collection of Big Bird, Snuffulupagus, and Elmo" then moves on to his sister's 3-foot-tall My Size Barbie doll. gives a lady a sensual foot massage in what will inevitably lead to passionate lovemakingawkwardly pokes girl's foot with replica Luke Skywalker lightsaber in pathetic attempt to have sexcollects autographed sports memorabilia, fine wines, and thongs from all the women he's bangedcollects small rodents, dead insects, and first-generation Star Trek memorabiliahas a closet full of savvy, sophisticated outfits to wearhas a closet full of dead prostitutes who were unwilling to wear "the Elmo outfit" to turn him onmouth is kept fresh with tic-tacs, gum, or mint sprayrecently caught insects are kept fresh by the heat and wetness of being sealed within his mouthepitomizes tall, dark and handsomeepitomizes deathhas a 1.2 GPAhas a 4.0 GPA