Walter Jeebles vs. Filbert Peevstein. Who will emerge the lesser loser?

Walter: "Yo momma's so fat, she takes up two MySpaces. And her Top 8 are all sandwiches."

Filbert: "Yo momma's World of Warcraft Blood Elf Shaman is at such a low level, she ran up against a Small Crag Boar and it was like "Nah, why bother."

Walter: "Yo momma's so old, her screenname is A."

Filbert: "Yo momma has so many carbon atoms, when she had a threesome with hydrogen and oxygen, the basic building blocks of organic matter formed."

Walter: "Yo momma called tech support about her hard drive problems. They said "empty the trash," and she put herself on the sidewalk."

Filbert: "Yo momma's iPod is so old, it doesn't support hip-hop."

Walter: "Yo momma's so fat, even her Sim is diabetic."

Filbert: "Yo momma is so stupid, when I asked her opinion of quantum chromodynamics as a non-abelian gauge theory, she thought the only group of massless quarks was SUL x SUR x UB(1) x U A(1)!"

Walter: "Yo momma is so dumb, she once played Simon. It went "Boop." She went "Boop." Then it went "Beep Boop." And she was like "Boop Boop." Shit!"

Filbert: "Yo momma is so supportive, she comforted me after T.J. poured baked beans down my pants in high school. And it stopped there, we didn't do anything sexual or anything, I just went home, but she was very nice."

Contributions from Jeff Rubin