First off, your teams are the Big Green. That's retarded. Big Green what? There are so many green things. Like the grass I'd have to smoke to stomach living in Hanover. Or the envy I'd have at other schools that actually have team names.
And then there's Blitz. You know what the rest of the world calls that? Email. But no, your email is faster! BLITZ! It's instant, like, well, any other email system. Your campus points are also called "dash" maybe you feel you need to get things done quickly. I bet it's because you're praying for the end of your drunken, thirty-below, mass mailing four years to come as soon as possible.
Thanks for having me. Go Big Green!