10. shit, now I have to join the peace corps

9. does anybody need a dead rabbit? and a bloody doorknob?

8. it's not cheating if they're identical

7. If this equation makes sense for you, then you've ruined my life: %n = BaByPrInCeSs386

6. Gotta go tell my gf something quickly, brb (idle for 16 hours 43 minutes)

5. time to get a dishwasher

4. i thought it was JRape.

3. it's not official until she changes her facebook status.

2. "You're a cheating bitch." – Robert Frost

1. it's not you. it's your chemo.