Happy Friday, everybody!  Guess what I just did?  Yup, that’s right, downloaded and watched the entire Screech Sex Tape, which was released on the internet this week.  53 straight minutes of awkward mid-sex jokes and Dustin Diamond referring to his penis as ‘the monster.’  Verdict?  I was NOT impressed by the sex.  However, I WAS impressed that the girl managed not to bust out laughing every time the self-titled ‘D Man’ told her to ‘take out the beast.’  I give it two and a half stars. 
(Source: WWTDD)

Nothing too exciting went down in Hollywood this week, but here are a few fun tidbits to slip into your conversations this weekend.

Earlier this week at some random party, Lindsay Lohan took an hors d’ouevre off a waiter’s tray, chewed it a little, and then spit it back onto the tray, saying that it “tasted like shit.”  Is it just me, or is L.Lo sounding more and more like a drunk frat guy every week?  “Bro, bro watch this shit.  I’m gonna spit some chewed up food onto that waiter’s tray, it’s gonna be fucking BRAHWESOME.  Dude, bro, bet me twenty bucks I won’t do it.”
(Source: Egotastic)

Here’s some terrible yet hilarious news – the executive producer of “House of Carters” is in talks with KFed about developing a reality show for him.  Coincidentally, the plot will be almost identical to that of the recent HBO documentary “How Poop Is Made.” 
(Source: DListed)

Paris Hilton told a magazine this week that she’s ready to be a mother, and that owning pets has prepared her for motherhood.  By these standards, I was ready to have a baby at age 5 when I won my first goldfish at a carnival.  Also by these standards, my baby’s name would have been “Wembley” from Fraggle Rock.
(Source: IDLYITW)

Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston finally broke up this week, due in part to the fact that Vince cheated on Jen with some random college chick.  The story broke when the girl emailed her sorority sisters with the details.  Because the first thing you should do when you have a scandalous affair with a celebrity is mass email 400 of your closest friends. 
(Source: WWTDD)  

And finally in the news this week, Beyonce is a robot and her skin is melting off.  Anybody surprised?  Perfect, me neither.  Have a good weekend!


(Source: IDLYITW)