You: Hey Grandpa.
Grandpa: Hey, Sport, how’ve you been? How are classes?
You: Alright, they’re pretty hard. I’m doing okay though.
Grandpa: It’s okay if you take some time to have fun too ya know.
You: Yeah, I know.
Grandpa: Chase after some broads right champ?
You: (Laugh uncomfortably) Yeah, well I guess…
Grandpa: French kiss some dames, fondle some sweethearts and all that hullabaloo.
You: Right. So, umm, how is grandma?
Grandpa: Stick your hand down the front of a few skirts, tally-wag some of that freshmen pie.
You: Oh you know what? I think I should help my mom with dinner-
Grandpa: (Taps your crotch) Get this old thing goin’, am I right Ace?
You: Listen, I-
Grandpa: Your grandma, well you can’t tell now, but back in the day her tits used to-
You: Grandpa! I really feel incredibly-
Grandpa: Well she hides it, but she has a set of cans that would make any young buck go wild.
You: Wow.
Grandpa: Anyway, tell me, did you saddle up this year, chief?
You: Saddle up?
Grandpa: Did you hop on board the inner-labia train?
You: What?
Grandpa: Did you take the express? Did you take the straight and narrow or did you take the old dirt road if you know what I mean. (Nudges you really hard)
You: This is really weird for me, Grandp-
Grandpa: Did you paint the vaginal wall? Did you paint it translucent?
You: I have to go.
Grandpa: Come on!
You: I hope you die soon.