Michael Jackson

Step 1: Hang out with a young boy suffering from a terrible illness.

Step 2: Pick up a Happy Meal from McDonald’s.

Step 3: Replace the toy with my junk in that box.


Michael Richards

Step 1: Find the guys I called “n———“.

Step 2: Offer a sincere apology…

Step 3: And my dick in a box.


Nick Lachey

Step 1: Win back Jessica.

Step 2: Cut a hole in a box.

Step 3: Put my di … God DAMMIT! She was right, I’m too small…


Rosie O’Donnell

Step 1: Cut a hole in a box.

Step 2: Put my junk in that box.

Step 3: Is there anything more disturbing that the thought of my dick in a box?


OJ Simpson

“If I Were to Put My Dick in a Box, Here’s Where I’d Cut the Hole.”