Enough of that fallacy. Ellen Degeneres is Americas favorite dyke. Correction, favorite lesbian. Wait, X that, America’s favorite homosexual. If she was an American Gay Idol contestant against Rosie O’Donnell, Paris Hilton, John Stamos, and any Queer Eye Guy, Degeneres would win the text messaging vote. She just cannot be harmed. A successful 1990's sitcom, tabloid lesbian love that ended in her partner going back to the right way (sex with a man), a fancy family morning talk show in the GW Bush era, and American Express ads featuring animals (kiddies love animals). I would bet my right and left testicles that if she married Hillary Clinton, they would be America’s next power couple, dildo strapping TomKat or ParisJap. The headline atop US Weekly would read; HilGen, or Ellenary. Wait. HillaryGeneres. Oh fucking shit, I can only imagine Hillary’s campaign advertisement, “HillaryGeneres will give you her all. She is a generous being; Universal health care, civil unions, marijuana smoke, prostitutes for every returning Iraqi veteran. Most of all she will give you whatever she wants, she is a pleaser. I know, we sleep in the same bed. Do not vote for a whitewashed black and mexican, vote gay, we’re taking over the world one adopted African at a time. This is Ellen Degeneres-Clinton (the pre-nuptial forces Bill to change his name or face castration) and I want you to vote for my wife Hillary-Rodham-Clinton-Deg


Since this scenario is purely fiction, I anticipate the east coast power hungry sloppy second elitist whore to fall flat on her face. I speak of Miss Clinton. But I do consent she is not a whore, one must recall she forced her hubby to chase actually whores. She must have not been giving the pussy every night, day, second that a President of the free world requires. Laura Bush understands her role as sex object, Hilary did not. I have great disdain for The Hillary Clinton. But not the lady who sings Santa Baby on the Victoria Secret ads. I believe it is Elle McPherson. If so, she should start dildo fucking Hillary, perhaps I would vote for the former U.S. President’s sloppy seconds (she is actually the tired tenths). Wait, Elle would not be able to strap one on. She would be forced to take the penis that Hillary grew.