When, in a recent comment, I used the word 'sloot,' I found out that it apparently is not a universal term. And as such I wish to share my knowledge of the slut hierarchy with all of you fine college folk as to eradicate ignorance and allow our beautiful, loose, and adventurous college women to be classified by the names that they have fucked so hard to deserve –


Slut (n.)(s.) – The average female

     Yo brah, did you see that new slut in bio?


Sloot (n.)(s.) – An overly cock-hungry female

     Check out that sloot over there with her thong riding on her hips. You know broseph, that shit makes my dick so hard a cat can't scratch it!


Smut (n.)(s.) – The sluttiest of females

     Oh yea? Well Dildolicious told me that that smut isn't happy until she's air-tight. Let's grab another bro and invite her over for a Tupperware party doggie!


Smoot (n.)(pl.) – A group of 2-4 sluts, smoots, smuts or any combination of the three

     I see that smoot together up in the dining hall ALL the time… I think they are roomates.


Sput (n.)(pl.) – A group of 5 or more sluts, smoots, smuts or any combination of the three

     I was over at Tri-Delt last night and I've got to say, I'd love to give every one of the girls in that sput a complementary facial!


Sput Cakes (n.)(pl.) – A plethora of sput

     I hear that we're hosting the volleyball tourney this year.  Can't wait for those tight assed sput cakes to be on campus!