Matt Clarkson is busily surfing the web in his dorm when suddenly his cell phone rings. Matt: Oh, hi Grandpa, I'm glad you called.Grandpa: Matt, how are you? Finally got this cellular doohickey figured I think. What's my favorite grandson doing? Matt: Been Stumbling all night.Grandpa: Oh! You aren't hurt are you?Matt: No Grandpa, Stumbling. Online.Grandpa: What the hell is that? You're not looking at porn, I hope. Your Grandmother and I bought you that laptop, remember.Matt: Porn? No, of course not. Stumbling, it's like, uh, you look at websites. Grandpa: I thought they called that "surfing." It's called stumbling now?Matt: No, it's a website called StumbleUpon.Grandpa: StumbleUpon dot internet?Matt: No, Stumbleupon dot com.Grandpa: Oh
So, did you read about that fire that happened in our town yesterday?Matt: Oh yeah. It's funny, I actually Dugg that story right when it happened.Grandpa: You dug what now? Matt: That story.Grandpa: Why would you have to dig up a newspaper story? You didn't pick it out of the trash did you? I thought your parents gave you moneyMatt: No, Grandpa. Digg. It's like Stumbling, only it's like you're voting for a story online instead.Grandpa: Oh I get it. But aren't you afraid you'll stumble over something after you dig it up? Matt: Uh
yeah, well, it's a risk. Grandpa: We used to dig up land mines in the War.Matt: Oh yeah, I saw a video like that on YouTube once.Grandpa: My tube? Matt: No, YouTube. It's this website where you can watch a whole bunch of videos.Grandpa: What's that got to do with a tube?Matt: I guess it's kinda like, you know, the "boob tube."Grandpa: [Whispering] I told you he'd look at porn on that laptop, Henrietta.Matt: What? Grandpa: Just talking to your grandmother. Anyway, I also called to remind you about the family reunion at our new house next weekend. Did you get the directions your dad emailed you?Matt: Oh yeah, I saved them in my Del.icio.us page.Grandpa: Your delicious page? You're studying pastry now? I thought you said you wanted to be a lawyer.Matt: No, Del.icio.us. It's like, uh, a big site that bookmarks other sites.Grandpa: Why would you need to do that if you already stumbled all over them? Matt: I don't know. Oh, Grandpa, did you get my history essay I sent to you?Grandpa: Read it.Matt: Oh cool, you linked it on Reddit? I musta missed it. Reddit's okay I guess. But don't you agree their karma system's a little unfair? Grandpa: Huh, what? No, I read it. What the hell are you blabbering about, boy?Matt: Nothing. Forget I even said anything.Grandpa: Look, make sure to remind your sister about that reunion. You know how forgetful she is.Matt: Don't worry, I'll hit her up on Facebook in a second.Grandpa: Huh? I don't want you hitting her in the face. Matt: No, Facebook, Grandpa. Grandpa: Is that anything like that Myface I keep hearing about?Matt: You mean Myspace.Grandpa: Well, I don't give a damn whose whose space it is, just watch out for each other when you leave. There's a lot of crime in your city.Matt: Crime isn't that bad, actually. I Wiki'd last night and statistics showGrandpa: You did what last night?! What's Wikiing? That's not something gay, is it? Are you gay, Mathew?Grandmom: [Whispering to Grandpa] I knew it James, I always knew it.Matt: No, no. It's
never mind, Grandpa.